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The Vegas Hooker

A guy is strolling along Vegas Strip when a stunning hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks, "How much?" 

The Hooker replies, "$500 for a hand-job." The guy's jaw drops: "$500 dollars, For a hand-job! No hand-job is worth that kind of money!" 

The hooker says, "Do you see that Hard Rock cafe on the corner?" 

"Yes." 

"Do you see the Hard Rock about a block further down?" 

"Yes." 

"And beyond that, do you see that third Cafe?" 

"Yes." 

"Well," says the hooker, smiling invitingly, "I own those. And, I own them because I give a hand-job that's worth $500." 

The Guy says, "What the hell? I'll give it a try." They retire to a nearby motel. A short time later, the guy is sitting on the bed realizing that he just experienced the hand-job of a lifetime, worth every bit of $500. He is so amazed, he says, "I suppose a blow-job is $1,000?" The hooker replies, "$1,500." 

"$1,500? No blow-job could be worth that." 
The hooker replies, "Step over here to the window, big boy. See that casino just across the street? I own it. And I own it because I give a blow-job that's worth every cent of $1,500." 

The guy, basking in the afterglow of that terrific hand-job, says, "Sign me up." 
Ten minutes later, he is sitting on the bed more amazed than before. He can't believe it but he feels he truly got his money's worth. He decides to dip into the pension savings for one glorious and unforgettable experience. He asks the hooker, "How much for some pussy?" 

The hooker says, "Come over here to the window. Do you see how the whole city of Las Vegas is laid out before us, all those beautiful lights, gambling palaces, and showplaces?" 

"Damn!" the guy says, in awe, "You own the whole city?" 

"No," the hooker replies, "but I would if I had a pussy."

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