The Pilot and the Tower

A hotshot Air Force pilot was cruising at thirty thousand feet in his sleek, multi-million dollar stealth fighter. Feeling a bit overconfident, he keyed his mic and contacted the local air traffic control tower. "Tower, this is Nighthawk One. Requesting a flight level check. I’m currently at Mach 1.5 and climbing."

The controller, who had been dealing with a busy afternoon of slow-moving cargo planes and civilian Cessnas, didn't miss a beat. "Nighthawk One, we have you on radar. You’re looking fast and loud. Maintain your heading."

The pilot, wanting to impress the tower a bit more, decided to show off his technical specs. "Tower, just so you’re aware, we’ve got the most advanced GPS and terrain-following radar in the world. I could land this bird in a heavy fog with my eyes closed."

A moment later, a calm voice from a passing commercial pilot crackled over the radio: "That’s great, Nighthawk. But can you find the volume knob on your intercom? We can all hear you breathing."

The tower controller chimed back in immediately: "Nighthawk One, please confirm you’ve found the knob, or should we talk you through it using your advanced GPS?"