The Centennial Split

An elderly couple, both in their late nineties, walked into a lawyer’s office to file for divorce. The lawyer was stunned. "You two have been married for eighty years!" he exclaimed. "Why on earth would you want to get a divorce now?"

The husband sighed and looked at his wife, who nodded sadly. "Well," the old man rasped, "to be honest, we haven't been able to stand each other since our second anniversary. We've been miserable for decades."

The lawyer was even more confused. "If you’ve been unhappy for nearly eighty years, why did you wait until today to file the papers?"

The wife leaned forward, gripped her cane, and whispered, "We wanted to wait until the children were dead."