Neighborhood Security System

Kevin was tired of packages disappearing from his porch, so he went to the local shelter and asked for the most vigilant, alert, and focused guard dog they had. They introduced him to Buster, a sleek Doberman mix who looked like he could track a squirrel across three counties. The shelter manager promised that Buster wouldn't take his eyes off a target for anything.

The first night, Kevin set up a stakeout. He peeked into the living room and saw Buster sitting perfectly still, his ears pricked and his gaze fixed with terrifying intensity. However, Buster wasn’t looking at the front door. He was staring directly at the bottom of the refrigerator.

Two hours passed. Buster didn't move a muscle. He didn't even blink. Kevin was impressed by the stamina but confused by the strategy. "Maybe there’s a mouse under there," Kevin whispered to himself. He decided to test the dog’s focus by dropping a heavy book in the hallway. Buster didn't even flinch. He remained locked onto the fridge like a laser beam.

Finally, Kevin walked over and tapped the dog on the shoulder. "Buster, buddy, the burglars are outside, not under the lettuce crisper. What are you guarding?"

Buster slowly looked up, his tail giving one solitary, hopeful wag. He let out a soft whine and nudged a single, stray pepperoni slice that had rolled under the appliance three days ago. "I'm not guarding, Kevin," the dog’s expression seemed to say. "I'm negotiating. And so far, the fridge is winning."