Cat Finally Gets a Job

After years of sleeping 16 hours a day and knocking things off tables, my cat decided it was time to “contribute to the household.”

So I got him a job at a local office.

Day one, he shows up late, ignores everyone, and spends most of the morning staring out the window.

By noon, he’s already knocked over three coffee mugs, shredded a stack of important documents, and hissed at the manager for “invading his personal space.”

HR calls me by the afternoon.

They say, “We’re not sure what his role is supposed to be.”

I said, “He’s in management.”

They pause.

“Well… he hasn’t done anything.”

I replied, “Exactly. He’s already outperforming expectations.”